Bad Wolf Bay, Again
by skusefil
Summary: Another version of what occurred on Bad Wolf Bay when Rose and 10too are left behind. Rated k for family friendly This is the first in a series of short stories that I didn't know I was going to write.


Don't own anything from Doctor Who.

Bad Wolf Bay, Again

Rose Tyler, defender of the earth stood quietly listening to the fading echo of the Tardis as it left her and Pete's World behind. Distantly, she felt a hand take her own. There was nothing left to look at, there the Tardis had been, so she turned slightly to look at the man beside her. She had no words at that moment. She just stood there looking.

He looked back gravely, giving her the chance to speak first. When she didn't, he weeded his way through the words he felt he ought to say, wanting to choose the most comforting one.

"It's alright to be confused or angry, Rose, it really is." He stated carefully.

She exhaled slightly, then shook her head. He could see the inner battle she was fighting because it was written all over her face.

"Everything will work out, I promise." He just hoped it worked out the way he wanted.

"You promise." she repeated, almost to herself. Then her eyes flashed and she seemed to come alive again. "That's just fine except for one bloody thing. Just who are you?" she demanded.

"It's me, Rose. The Doctor." he seemed a little surprised at her question.

"No, he was the Doctor," she jerked her head in the direction from which the Tardis had vanished. "You are not him."

"That's not exactly correct." was his reply. "I'm hm. He's me"

Rose's face took on a determined look.

"Since you say you're him, then maybe you can answer this: what in the world just happened? Can you explain this to me so that it makes any kind of sense at all?"

She was getting angry, he noticed, and to him that seemed a good sign. Get it all out now.

Nodding to a high dry spot away from the water, the Doctor said "Let's sit there for a bit."

As they walked to the indicated spot, Jackie walked to the water's edge. The waves crashing would make it harder to hear Pete on the phone, but it looked as though something louder might be brewing between those two. Sometimes it was better to keep some distance.

The Doctor and Rose sat down and she looked at him, daring him to answer the question she had posed to him.

"You remember the first time you saw me regenerate? I told you then that every cell in my body was dying." He paused, thinking.

"And?" she prompted.

"During regeneration the cells die, but then every cell regenerates, renews itself in preparation for the new body. During that particular regeneration,, the one on the gamestation, I noticed a kind of lull between the healing part of it and the creation of the new form. It was a very brief lull, but it did exist and this time, after being shot by the Dalek I decided to use that lull to well, cheat a little."

He sighed and tugged on his earlobe. Then he continued. "I knew you didn't want to face a whole different me and I knew that I wasn't ready to go yet so when that short time between healing and creation occurred, I threw off the regeneration energy. It turned out that not only did I throw off the energy, but I also threw off myself, my consciousness. Kind of divided myself up you might say. The me that was healed by the energy remained with you and the others. The me that was thrown off went to the Time Lord dna that existed in the jar with my original hand. Since the me that was healed kept so much of the, uh," he floundered. "The me stuff, there wasn't enough in the jar to form a complete body. Then Donna touched it and her dna was drawn in, and the me you see here now was completed. But there was a bit of a shortage of Time Lord material, so I have only one heart, one life. I can still spend it with you, if you want."

"So," Rose spoke her thoughts slowly. "If Mum slapped you here, he would feel it out there?"

"No, that's not the way it works."

"But if you are the same man, it should."

The doctor leaned toward her slightly and tried to clarify the subject without ruining his own argument. "We were the same man up until the time the regeneration energy was thrown off. After that, we became different men. Sort of like when I regenerated at the gamestation. The old me, the one you met at the shop where you worked, was still me but different than the me that formed then. Out there, now that is the new old me. The new new me is right here,"

"But when you regenerated then there was only one of you"

"Would you prefer that one of us, the me out there or the me right here, died so the other could go on?"

"Course not." She eyed him with a wry expression. No matter which him he was, he still knew that Rose Tyler's one heart was too big to wish death for anyone, and never the Doctor.

"When you first saw this face and I said Barcelona, you were upset. You wanted the Doctor that you had just lost. It took some time for you to accept that the man who told you to run in the shop basement was the same man with the new teeth and sideburns. Can you think of that and understand this a little bit better?"

"You're saying that I want him just because he is the Doctor that I am used to? That's not true!"

"I know that, Rose. I know that you love him, but when you said that to him, he and I were the same man. We are only different now, two men, because of the meta crisis. How about this. Think of a tree, one that has a large trunk that then forks into 2 large branches higher up. The trunk belongs to both branches. Because of the trunk, both branches have the same history. They share everything up until the time whatever caused the tree to fork happened. It's the same with him and me. The meta crisis happened. We divided from each other but not from our shared past,"

"So if you are both the same, same thoughts and all, why did he leave and you stay? Why wasn't it the other way?"

He said to her softly and with so much caring in his voice "You are asking me why he left you behind. I can tell you that he left you only because he thought it was the right thing for you. Did he really believe that I was so dangerous that I needed a keeper? I don't think he did. He was trying to give himself more reasons for leaving. He knew that he had to do the hardest thing he'd done in oh so many years, He didn't want to leave you. He wanted you to travel with him always. But you don't have always and he does. He saw me and knew that the right thing for you was to leave you with the him that could really be with you. One hundred percent. He can't do that because behind every thought of you that he has stands the fact he can't have forever with you. That hurts him. That keeps him from one hundred percent. He wants you but he also wants the best for you. He knows the best for you is the him that can love you without reservation."

"So he loves me but he can't love me without guarding himself?"

"From the pain of losing you at the end of your days."

"And you, you were the man I was with through it all. The werewolves and the daleks" Rose said.

"And thru the Sycorax and the wire and absolutely everything else." he nodded.

"It was you and him both. One man then, two men now."

His smile flooded his face with exhilaration. "That's right! One man then two men now. Rose Tyler, brilliant as always"

"Answer one more question, Doctor, yeah?"

The doctor's eyes danced over her animated face and he gave her an enthusiastic nod.

"Me stuff? That's the best you can come up with? No long terms about superior Time Lord physiology, no scientific terms or chemistry? She bumped his shoulder with her own. "Me stuff! Bet Pete will offer you a job as Vitrex spokesman, you having that superior vocabulary and all."

"This much I can tell you, if it meant I could stay with you I could be a spokesman for anything.." He laughed, feeling relief for the first time since the Tardis left.

She gave him a big smile and said "Don't make promises you can't keep. You haven't tasted that drink yet, not the cherry flavor or the lemon or cola. It even comes in pear."

"Pear," the Doctor said. "after everything is said and done, I might even be able to do pear, if it means being with you."


End file.
